My goal for the party is to get everyone in a diaper. Reasonable?
it tasted disgusting. but i pretty much drank it in the name of science, and free alcohol
My vibrator challenges you to a duel.
I don't remember much, but my night is dated pre-Jaeger and post-Jaeger. Also, my boss may or may not have tucked me in.
Reached a new low. Drinking Wine from my thermos while on the stair master.
laying on floor next to bathroom with vent on to give myself comfort and remind me that im not going deaf. what did i smoke?
Dude, she got "I party too much" skinny. She looks like a recovering drug addict.
Hey... Tell me if you remember differently, but nobody truly saw me naked, right?
She leaned in close to me, made eye contact, and seriously whispered "I will eat your soul with bacon bits." I want whatever drug she was on.
I'm in a corner eating carrots and drinking champagne. I've hit a new kind of low.
How is that low? I love carrots.
oh. oh my god. i just had lunch with my mom with semen still on my face.
I'm at the nutcracker high as shit. It's so beautiful. I cried.
She has that type of face she reminds me of that weird girl from napoleon dynamite only taller and with hoop earrings.
He's gonna be like you slept with too many of my friends and you're being voted off the island haha
you blew the guy with all the harry potter paraphanelia didn't you
Randomize
