It's like God shit irony all over that family
I wish they made portable blow up dolls for girls.
It's called a dildo, genius. Go to sleep.
coulda been worse. everyone in the drunk tank got free mcdonalds breakfast
Say what you want, but those Fraggle Rock DVDs have gotten me laid twice.
I got rejected. By another girl. At a red light. In front of seven shirtless cyclists in the middle of the night. How is that normal?!?
Half my face is frozen, my vagina is broken, I'm wearing only gym shorts eating a plate of mashed potatoes, avatar is on my tv. There's a naked guy on my couch whose name idk. I needa talk to you asap
I think we should get high on adderall and nair each other again for New years.
I feel like I should be doing a victory lap around my house to the rocky music, or zapping and smiting people with my mystic wizard powers
Dude, you flipped off a cat from my balcony and yelled at it to get a house
my mom just told me I should hit it and quit apparently she does not like this new girl
They're frat boys at heart and have sickly, dusty, rotting souls.
How'd the date with the redheaded dentist go?
She didn't like my gingervitis joke
So none of you told me my tits were popping out of my shirt for three hours?
We told you. Repeatedly. You said you made it look good.
THERE IS A DOG IN THE CLUB. I repeat a dog in the club. I might have laid down and petted it..I have no shame.
Sorry, I didn't know he was with you. The ongoing collapse of Trump has me horny as hell.
Randomize