shaved balls and baby powder=awesome
the entire time we were hooking up i couldn't stop thinking about the bengals. thoughts?
I thought this kinda shit only happens to ugly people
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
Yeah he got kind of mad when he found out he had chased his last two shots with a combination of orange soda, water, and used mouth wash.
Today's been pretty great, I went and bought the new Batman for the sole purpose of masturbating to Bane
Are you coming to class or was the dick pic this morning your way of saying not today?
I told him finishing at the same time would be a long-term project. Like flipping a house. A sexual house.
The only reason I have clothes in my overnight bag is to cover up my sex toys.
If there's anything my liberal arts education has taught me, it's belligerence.
Shooting a bottle rocket from my penis was entirely justified. Twenty bucks is twenty buck no matter how you look at it
If we had a dog do you think we would be less hoe-y?
Nah
Interesting fact: if you wanted to rename a guy Jeff, just tell him you only fuck Jeffs. Magically whatever name he was using is actually his middle name cause he doesn't like going by Jeff.
don't take this the wrong way, but I'm not drunk but I need you to take me to the ER and you're the most likely to not be drunk now.
He made me come so hard I punched another hole in the wall mid orgasm.
I'm not fixing this one for you. Do it your own damn self.
Randomize
