I'm at the bar with Ashley what should I do?
humiliate her
You dropped me off at the wrong girl's house.
There's no such thing as a "wrong girl" make it happen.
alright see you in the morning.
I was eating her out when she coughed, I just swallowed a bright red blood clot
Well, let's be honest here. You're dealing with gay guys... EVERYTHING has an emotional attachment.
She definitely looked like a troll, but I had take one for the team. Or at least thats what I keep telling myself
mom brought her knitting needles with her. its bad enough to be in the ER on new years, but to be with the knitting parent!?
My mom just set up beer pong in the dining room for family game night. and you ask why I'm still living at home.
he went up stairs with nothing on but calvin klein's and an eskimo hat, said hi to her dad, got a doughnut, and left like it was an everyday thing
Had no idea what his name was when I woke up. Went through his desk, found his tax records. Ben. And loaded.
Well, my nose won't stop bleeding from really bad cocaine and my purse is full of plastic gold coins. Also, someone saved in my phone as "tyrannosaurus sex" won't quit texting me. Savannah won. Let's put it that way.
He was president of his frat and had a clap on disco ball in his room... or course I slept with him
I just told the sun to stop. That hungover.
don't worry, i'm not mad. i'm just angry. and furious. and about to set your ass on fire.
Came out of blackout state to the curtains torn down & the headboard laid on top of him. & yes he was still breathing
She dry humped my leg in the raw while I was still dressed, came, and then fell asleep on top of me. All I got was a bruised thigh. 2020 needs to end.
Randomize
