we fucked to don't stop believing. most epic sex EVER.
My mom asked me to donate my child hood stuffed animals to the poor then I realized I was hiding liquor behind them. I told her I was too attached to them. She understood. Wrong in so many ways.
season finale of lost and an oz of weed. tonight my mind is going to be blown.
Dude totally calling you out on watching when harry met sally on netflix on demand on april 8th.
he tried to make a toast, but hit the moving ceiling fan with his beer instead
Sometimes I wonder why I hang out with you. And then you show up half naked at my door with a half gal of vodka, and I remember why.
We found her on the trampoline. She told us she was jumping so she could puke & rally. I think I want to marry her.
I have to date her we need a place to stay for tailgating
I don't think I will ever be as happy about anything as this man next to me on the bus eating Taco Bell.
And my nipple is sore from him biting it. That is not a complaint.
I'm developing all these feelings it's disgusting.
I was alternating between saying "yall need Jesus" and "God bless" the entire night
I need water and some morals
MY HISTORY TEACHER IS FUCKING MY MOTHER. I am downstairs and i can hear the squeak of the bedsprings please I swear to god pick me up THIS INSTANT.
All I can taste is Pickle Juice and Cocaine.
Randomize
