I lost my shoes and bra and was beyond mapquesting
That chick needs a catscan. And fuck it, we're still ordering in a stripper
My glasses are somewhere in your living room. Also, my underwear might be in your bathroom or on or around your porch. Sorry.
I promise a much better performance tomorrow than last night my penis has a bed time
Just did lines off your face, congrats on getting in the magazine bro
Bloody Mary Monday just took a turn for the worst... Just had a heart to heart talk with the cat about it's obsession with chewing on cardboard.... Time for a nap.
todays sighting is titled: Bum taking pictures with an invisible camera.
FUCK YOU. AH. FUCK BOTH OF US MORE BOOZE.
MAS TEQUILA.
I'm tired and starving, and I'm pretty sure I just cost the company 33,000 dollars...fuck you and you're "you'll love going to work high" nonsense.
I'm sort of afraid for my life tho. If the 4th of July can be the way it was a DMX show is capable of anything
how do you casually eat pancakes with someone after they send you an unsolicited dick pic?
you don't. it's the point of no return for pancake enjoyment.
I just trimmed my bush to manageable levels. I'm gonna take a nap and then get in there and finish the job.
I'm at a loss. By loss I mean singing songs from Wicked and pretending I'm at the Oscars
I NEED HELP. IM TRIPPIN BAWLS IN THE BACK OF MY MOMS CAR.
i told her we had a class about unicorns together. i'd say it was a good night
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