walking home from your place the other day I saw a man with a ponytail sitting on some church steps petting a plant
he should get drunk with us
you know he's having a sex change. I can't believe you called him "titty man" to his face....
Do they take checks?
Did you really just ask me if you could write a check for a DRUG DEAL?
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
I'm pretty sure we put the facepaint on during whippets
Yeah I mean its Vermont, not like id be the first guy to trade pharmaceutical services for beer
That little tingle vodka gives me in my esphagus is what lets me know I'm still alive.
My mascara kind of smells like tequila to me...Is this my body crying for help or asking for a shot?
Her virginity is one of the last things that remains of our childhood.
It's like some sort of initiation to finger one of them... so I did it. And got high fived afterwards like a dozen times.
Those were right hand only?
Well she just asked a sorority girl if she should fuck her floor mate so it's basically like the blind leading the blind
I had sex in the back of a hot foreign guy with a lacoste eye patch's car
you asked the cab driver if he wanted to meet your parents, last night.
And how about the fact that the first time i really truly looked at a guy's dick was in my car. MY CAR. GODDAMNIT!!!
I was so high I kept trying to flush the toilet with the light switch
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