I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms
the pool opens at 11. by 1115 the ambulance had been called.
we are going to smoke at least three blunts before we go see Cloudy with a chance of meatballs. I'm going to have my mom make us spaghetti for when we get out so can your mom make those spicy meatballs? I thought I'd give you 9 days notice so everything's perfect.
What do ugly girls do when they get too drunk at parties. They can't pull the whole "sorry i passed out on your couch but i'm hot so it doesn't matter "card
What the fuck. The girl next to me just looked at her phone, put her stuff away, and popped a birth control and ran out of class. Lucky fucking guy.
you kept insisting that i was jake gyllenhaal and you were heath ledger.
How do guys with small dicks who cheat on their girlfriends get girlfriends!?!
What would you do in exchange for having a girl eat a waffle house waffle off your body?
I accidentally peed all over the couch. It's safe to say I'm not welcome at that house anymore
Why do you think she gets more guys?
well her prof pic is her in her bedroom looking hot and mine is me looking terrified while holding a giant spider at 6 flags, so there's that
I got tossed from adult league soccer for telling a 55 year old I'd break his hip. I'm a productive member of society
We are all done wearing pants today
I cannot believe all 4 of us had sex at the same time, in the same bed... And it didn't turn into a foursome..
Had to clear my browser history. I figured if she used the search bar and her name came up, it might be a little creepy.
Got any extra dick over there? I’m running low
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