Lonely and bored. Am I allowed to play Dance Dance Revolution by myself?
this guy at work is bossing me around at work. He is 24 and still has highlights and spikes his hair.
You're getting bossed around by a 1999 Highschool Yearbook picture?
he just spelled fiance, "pheancie". I dont think he's ready to get married.
I want to say that being forced to stare at the 'no.1 boyfriend' collage behind his head ruined the sex but it just didn't.
On my way to the DMV to get arrested
she just announce I'm david copper field and tried to shove a napkin down my throat
It wasn't a great time! You grabbed me, picked me up, and make me pee in the sink!
i have to vacuum my washing machine now, asshole
Let's put a bunch of beers in a backpack and shotgun them in a Red Lobster bathroom
I just used my dick as to measure where my desk would go because I don't have a tape measure or a ruler.
When a guy invites you to dinner and breakfast the next day it's implied that he's going to make some sweet loving in betwixt correct?
My "birthday sex" consisted of approximately 25 seconds of him going down on me in the shower.
after we fucked i left the room and when i came back he was patting his dick whispering "prouda you lil guy...prouda you"
Cmon. I wasn't that bad.
You stumbled ass first into the litter box, and everytime we tried to get you to move you said " if I fits. I sits."
I couldn't be more proud to be a cougar. Just wondering how these twenty somethings learned how to fuck so well? Must be porn.
Randomize