My head feels like little people r playing bumper cars inside it
We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
Also pencil in smooth jazz and illegal activities. The usual.
You're just mad at the fact that I want to be a car alarm.
She just said she wanted to get freaky and left the room. I'm almost certain I just heard the microwave.
When were having sex he was mumbling some guys name. If he wasn't as hot as he is I'd be concerned.
she walked out and i tried to get her to come back but i couldn't remember her name so i just whistled... future reference: that doesn't work
No more twerking this week. I think I dislocated a boob.
Well I just finished dry heaving so I think breakfast is a little further out for me
I was going to make you have an awkward boner around all your coworkers but then I fell asleep.
I just started talking about how noodles were so good
im questioning your sanity while also accepting your reality
Thank you for stroking my rage monster tonight.
Someone wrote "LazerSwords" on my cock last night. My erect cock. Tequila is no one's friend.
Also I literally googled "how to fold socks" so that's how my day is going. How's yours?
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