He lasted like 30 seconds. With a condom. I just expected more from the president of a frat.
1. I feel like Jello 2. The girl i hooked up with last night isn't here and a different girl is lying next to me. 3. I have no clothes on 4. Can guys go on walks of shame?
We ran out of things to say while we were playing Never Have I Ever so we started playing I Have Done This... Have You?
Note to self: don't jizz on a surface cleaned with Tilex. It WILL turn purple.
I met the perfect girl for you, she's smart, likes cars, has at least one ear, and really blue eyes!
please elaborate on, "atleast one ear"
No. He just yelled "youre having one more orgasm!" So he made that happen and then he rolled over and went to sleep.
its all coming back to me in waves....waves of humiliation and nausea.
we're using his nephews tonka truck toy as a cooler for the beer
After being his wingman last night, I've decided I will never talk about becoming a lesbian ever again. Picking up chicks is way too hard.
I think this agreement was sent by God. I get to do my own thing, get laid, and he still makes me breakfast in the morning.
So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
I had 17 beers 2 days ago. I'm not dad material yet
NO. FUCK YOU. I HOPE SOMEONE REPLACES YOUR LUBE WITH HOT SAUCE.
I'm playing trivia and drinking margaritas so now is not a good time.
Why is my belly button ring in my ear
Randomize
