my number is 615-555-1212, <3 your favorite asshole
So my shaver died while I was trimming...ya know. And now it is half way done. I don't think there's currently any aesthetic in keeping it this way...
why is there a picture of someone wearing Tevas with socks taped on the wall?
You would think that an uncircumcised man would understand how the hood of a clit works.
I kept grabbing at Stephanie's boobs because I thought the leopard spots on her dress were popcorn.
thats the sluttiest christmas spirit ever.
She either was great at sex or I finished the whole bottle of svedka my self
If you ever get the opportunity, make fun of how small his dick is for me
Between the booze, mechanical bulls, and penis's I think my body hates it when I'm single
Just a heads up, i'm sleeping in te back seat of your car so don't be freaked out when you see me in the A.M.
Just made a bong out of a pineapple. So yes.. And champagne is about to be popped
Its not often you get to say, "The security guard at my job is my new drug dealer," but as of last night, I get to say it.
i just realized I haven't been laid all summer. So sad. What a waste of a perfectly good vagina.
Maybe snorting K off penises isn't healthy
she told me id be a great addition to their lesbian community and shes giving me sex eyes from across the room. come get me NOW
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