so all night Ive been that girl with her tits out @ the bar. I mean I dropped jaws, yo. But in a classy way.
well,he told me "i bet you five bucks that i can right cum on the mirror with my cum" i said alright do it, lets just say he's five bucks richer...
low key just jizzed in a chinese food container
i just walked in on him masterbating..to a picture of me. that definitely has to be true love.
Hey fuck you and your taint. I'm just riding a canoe called life, back the fuck off. P.s. I need a ride
Jim came in did 3 body shots of her she said "I like your tongue" and they left. I swear to god its deja vu he's done it before
i'm just sitting here watching hocus pocus, eating takeout, and taking self esteem quizzes online while everyone is out partying. you tell me how my night is.
I am too drunk to be out in this weather around all these animals.
Are you drunk? Because I am and if you're not, this may be very awkward in the morning
Thats for me to know and you to find out.
my head feels like a yellow yolk spinning in a circle at the bottom of the bowl.. i may have a concussion, love auto correct
Pulled over to puke on the way to sign closing papers on the house...Good sign of responsibility.
She mentions her boyfriend one more time, I'm taking her home and breaking that shit up.
Right when he asked me if I was on birth control my dad walked in. This is my fate.
but I truly enjoy making out with my best friend more than my boyfriend
This town reeks of teen pregnancy.
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