Hey sorry for feelin' up your date. Sadly, this is a mass txt.
dude, your ex-bf is on match.com
details on that.
well, his profile doesn't say anything about herpes.
For the millionth time in his career, Brett Favre has screwed over the Vikings
So how many shot glasses of coffee grounds make a pot?
I'm not sure if what i'm hearing downstairs is sex or not, but if it is, it sounds like there's a dog involved...i'm mildly concerned.
its 4:30 pm. In the mall. Just threw up into my hands. I love Vegas and Vegas loves me
The last thing I remember is yelling "ill handle this" while wearing a lion suit and holding a jug of vodka when the RAs came
they bet me shots that I couldn't give people piggyback rides around the club just cause I'm 125lbs and a girl...I had a line forming after the third guy.
We don't watch enough power rangers
Told her my spirit animal was the spread eagle. Now that's my name in her phone.
We had to take the hinges off the bathroom door. Needless to say, you are no longer welcome at that bar
not a day goes by that I don't wish you were here or I there. Today it was because I had the desire to get high and go look at the jellyfish at the aquarium and you're the perfect buddy for that.
He put on a roller derby documentary. It was either bore myself to death watching that or take off my dress. He was very appreciative.
At least his std test came back clean, gotta look at the positives here
Having to do the walk of shame on crutches was defiently a first for me. cheers to the governor, klove
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