do you think they make care bear costumes for cats?
btw, her name was actually Alixx. in retrospect, it was pretty much a gimme
he built a boat made of joints. holyyy shit
I have bruises on my ass from her spurs. God bless Texas.
Would it be weird if I told you I thought of you when I masturbated?
Looks like I'm more than just your Mexico mistake...
Of course... Double fistin nati light cuz the powers out and it cuts down the times i gotta open the fridge... Genius
You're mold. I may or maynot have puked blood this morning.
Ugh contemplating vodka and chocolate protein powder as this Capri sun and vodka isn't really cutting it
I found out he put two potatoes in a jar because he wants to make his own vodka.
Also, since I switched back to this phone I've found a crop of dick pics and your funeral arrangements.
It's Saturday night and I'm getting shitfaced alone while reading Dino porn. Wassssuuuupppp
I also slapped not one but two bananas on the ass, twerked in public, and I think I made out with someone
I'm being hhit on by creepy guys please come one bought me a penis hat balloon animal save meeeee
Nothing much. Just taking shots of tequila before I go get a bikkini wax. You?
I covered the puke with a shingle there's not many chunks. I think it will blend quickly.
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