I wish scraping a resin bowl could be considered cleaning.
He cooked me dinner. I showed my appreciation by showing up shithoused and breaking a bottle of steak sauce on his floor.
Its like after 6 beers, the clap doesn't scare me anymore.
The twins are whispering in turkish together. I think I did something bad last night.
Semen is not good for contacts.
pretty sure that drunk girl we saw climbing the stairs is now DJing this club....
Oh my god what did I do. My hands are scraped, there are pickles on the floor, my clothes are wet, and I don't remember how I get here. Thank you.
I have a cut on my head from a tambourine.
I'm kinda surprised he wouldn't be honored to take me back as a fuck buddy.
He handcuffed himself to the keg... D is hooking up with him anyway.
I opened the door and his girlfriend was standing there; we made silent, prolonged eye contact as I quietly put on my panties and left.
so this maintenance guy stood at the corner of my cubical and scratched his balls for like a full minute cause he thought no one could see him
I am just High Enough to train A-Team of bodybuilding squirrels MMA techniques to tear you asunder. And it's not that I want to is just don't you make me do it!
I need some buff guys to cuddle me and call me precious
What did you delete my number or something
Oh honey. What makes you think I saved in in the first place?
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