Pretty people don't get stds, I knew it
Just got booed while taking a piss and asked if I 'call that a penis.' Get me the fuck out nf yankee stadium.
Last night after we fucked, I washed my vag in vodka so I wouldn't get an STD
Or, you could have used a condom
I had never watched a guy jack off to me before, but let me tell you, it was a very uncomfortable experience.
we usually just have an Easter beer hunt and never end up at church anyways
"Hung over, tired and having a faint scent of some body butter and random pieces of glitter from a girl named gigi, almost arrested in drug bust, $40 Canadian in my pocket and all i got was this lousy Tshirt" shirts dont exist, but they need to
she tends to only attract lesbians and homeless men
Last time I stayed at my moms my fucking car got set on fire sooo maybe I should think this through.
I BIT YOU IN THE DINING ROOM. I bit you and you crunched
I think having a vagina should be considered a skill, give me a break.
Milk that cash cow for all the shots she's worth
Maybe snorting K off penises isn't healthy
He is getting no nudes from me. I don't even care if I'm losing his legal advice.
It's one am and you're asking me if you should buy a plane ticket for a booty call.
she's 6'2. you bet your ass i slept with her.
Randomize