Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
Gay TA. Finally going to boost my GPA your way.
His bond is $50,000..margarita Monday might get cancelled
This year I'm going to try NOT getting arrested. I think the 30th birthday is the cutoff for calling Mom to bail me out.
I'm not making any promises. But if I start throwing food at you, just go with it.
She just laid there, sucking on a piece of steak, with the most content look on her face. Just before she passed out (steak still on her mouth) she said the cat box needed to be emptied
I left the guinea pigs on the dryer. Make sure to take care of them.
I was told I sang Taylor Swift's entire discography in between violent bursts of green vomit before falling asleep in the bath tub
Kellie accidentally ran into the car with two teenagers making out. made a big thud. there was a loud scream and she was gone...haven't seen her since
mom how many of the songs from my childhood are mexican drinking songs?
all of them.
After we finished having phone sex he proceeded to serenade me with Ave Maria. It was magical.
All I could think about while we were fucking was what Hogwarts house he would be in
I'm trying to drink up the confidence to run in public.
Pretty sure my aunt hooked up with one of my brothers frat brothers at his graduation party
I WILL go to space. And if we find aliens I WILL fuck one. It’s the Marine Corps way
Randomize
