Me hooking up with her is like rush being president. Bad news.
Did yall have sex?
Well we both woke up naked and there was a condom wrapper on the floor, but I don't remember so does that count?
Def not... that's how I managed to keep my number under 10 for all of college- If you don't remember, it didn't happen
She is totally STD
Is it a bad omen that my phone auto corrects dtf to STD
you came back at 4am in a suit jacket and a half eaten burrito...
just when i thought i had forgotten how badthe sex was he comes across campus solely to say hi
And I can taste the vodka through my ears. Good god.
Almost told my boss I was an expert aat swallowing when he questioned my ability to take excedrin,xanax, and a vitamin all at once. It was a medicinal gang bang lubricated by arizona tea.
You know it's a good party when even the dealers were too fucked up. Just found and counted 140 E pills I found in a bag in the couch. Just paid for weed this month.
4 girls from the bar, me, strip basketball. here. NOW
You told me my blanket felt like ground beef.
....she made me stop for like 3 minutes so she could talk to her cat....
I can't feel the bottom half of my face but i feel like our sex would be amazing
So what happened? Or does sex + ramen pretty much cover it?
Considering we almost incited a riot on behalf of LGBT rights I have to say that was the best time for our moral compass to turn south.
Fun fact: deep throating plus dehydration plus eating a lot of citrus = my throat is fucked. Metaphorically and physically.
Randomize
