They're sharing a mixed drink at a bar with straws...its like a disney movie with booze
whispering "taste the rainbow" well having sex isn't my biggest turn on.
I'm at the cafe. It's 7am. There is a girl I don't know on my futon who tried to tickle me this morning when I got down from my loft. I also not wearing any underwear.
Just got walked in on while fucking in the lounge in the performing arts building. The janitors gave us five minutes to leave and applauded our exit
Dude, i don't know. I don't remember anything after we started chanting/playing "shot of gin."
If I puke off the kayak tomorrow think nothing of it.
Medically speaking as your gynecologist and your girlfriend, that is not a rash.
And we're breaking up
There's no way you didn't at least start out with a dick. I obviously know there isn't one now, but there is no way that you were born a girl
Well, I woke up on a roll-away, with a knot in the back of my head and penis confetti stuck to me. Also, I apparently literally gave the shirt off my back right before I passed out, so I was topless. Vegas won this trip.
Well I mean he still had sex with me after I told him that I play fetch with the kids I take care of, so I'm not really looking too far ahead with him...
I think I just got drunk texted by my psychiatrist
I just saw an ad for "fair trade quinoa vodka". Fuck this world and everyone in it.
Who the fuck stole my fridge again
I guess you could say that.. I mean, we did walk in on our DD doing a keg stand thru her ass.
Sorry I bailed on you yesterday. I was propositioned.
And you don't turn down margaritas and oral.
Randomize