Theres puke in my trash can and spilled beer next to my bed... come get your girlfriend
WHO ATE OUR COOKIES WHAT THE FUCK THOSE WERE GOURMET
He went soft
Wait. During?
Yeah, he was IN. MY. MOUTH.
we were hanging out in his room and he decided to play WoW.. so i took off all my clothes while he wasn't paying attention and laid on his bed and started playing with myself.
did he notice?
of course he didn't notice.. he was playing a fiesty level 1 fucker that wouldn't give up..
I need a DD tuesday morning around 9 AM
I'm scared to ask why.....
1st bikini wax. Jose Cuervo is helping me prepare.
There are going to be so many Snookis this Halloween that I might just dress as the guy that hit her and punch them all in the face
you just stood there spinning and got mad if anyone tried to stop you
I took us ten minutes to realize the shower sex going upstairs was the reason the kitchen ceiling was flooding.
You'd think if the campus holds 28,000 undergrad I wouldn't run into three people I've hooked up with in one day
You aren't going to like my movie choice because it's a Disney movie, but I am cordially inviting you to the couch for blowjobs.
Only you would get a side of potential vagina with your sandwich
Just because your gf gives mediocre bjs doesn't mean I can fill that void
The chances of me making out with someone next weekend are about the same as me not remembering it.
I kept falling all over the place and yelled at the bouncer you can't kick me out I'm from Texas.
Holy shit dude........stairs
Randomize
