We should go out drinking together soon
I'm still not going to have sex with you
At my boss' house at a bbq. Had a few beers. Taking a poop - there's no TP...this is my nightmare.
Greg found me on xtube. Who knew random hook ups would leave their web cams on and upload it. At least it shows off big penis.
After 9 shots a girl with a mustache......still not attractive
you kept screaming that dicks were growing out of your back and then you started crying cause they were so far from your vag
could you get any more awkward?
Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
you were trying to give my penis an indian burn.
That glade motion activator thing keeps going off every time we pass the bong. I don't know what I'm getting high off right now.
Then he told me he was proud of me for remembering that i blew him that night.. Maybe my drinking is getting out of hand.
HELP A SISTER OUT. AND KEEP YOUR TONGUE OUT OF THE HUMMUS.
TOO HIGH TO FIGURE THIS SHIT OUT
She wants to go furniture shopping for memorial day so we've gotta go portable
thermos full of jaeger bombs?
Affirmative
sorry there isn't a 'perfect ass' emoji
That's why god made go-pro's and tequila
For a girl who cried from fear the last time she was asked out, this. Is. TERRIFYING!
He showed me a picture of his family on Instagram and his dad was my Sugar Daddy. ABORT.
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