Now hope fervently that she'll do it quick and cheap, just the way i like it
It's like having an annoying little brother who wants to have sex with you
Her sex list was a LOT longer than mine. She tried to justify it by saying '4 of those don't count because they were in the gang bang'.
We're doing a case race on Saturday.
I'm in. I'm currently drinking a beer in the bathtub so I guess I can consider this "practice" and not just "alcoholism"
I just want one of her status not to be about Jesus.
Just saw two dudes run across the street carrying a mini keg and a scaled model of the empire state building. Missed this town
I just invented spray cheese vodka. tastes real nasty but does the trick.
Cops are just so fun an beautifuk
Apparently the Massachusetts Bay Transit Authority severely looks down on Chinese firedrills on a public bus
Yeah but the people love.
She found my old SD card with stuff I "didn't keep" or "didn't record us doing".... She's pissed but really horny. Did I just win at sex?
Came home to my roommate drinking a 40 in the shower. Chugging with his hair still fully shampoo'd.
Every time we have sex, I feel his dick ramming my soul into submission. Problem is..... I LIKE THAT SHIT!
He said watch this and then went and tripped into a group of 40 year old women, now he's leaving the club with them.
Foreign objects found in purse this morning include: chocolate covered pretzels, pepper spray, and farm animal shaped key chains (you know the ones you squeeze and fake poop comes out, yea those)
He made me spaghetti, gave me wine and I fucked him on the floor, Is that a fair trade of services to you?
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