I'm not really sure actually. until I fell in love with a boy (which was just a few weeks ago) I thought my attraction to men was purely physical.
so you were gay...and then you realized you were EVEN MORE gay
What started out as a threesome has become me sitting here watching them have sex... Can I get a ride home?
There is a guy standing at my bar right now wearing an affliction SUIT. I can't wait on him.
Whatever. I'm saving myself for my wedding night or a night with enough patron.
You said your dick dragged you up the stairs
And it was confirmed to me that I did in fact cut my girlfriend out of her dress with my sword.
the elusive kegmastree, who's mystery is only exceeded by it's power
Fourth time I had to be woken up in the line of Whataburger in two weeks. First time my shirt was free of vomit.
I have two stamps on my hand....ones from the bar and one is from an aquarium...care to explain?
The EMT told me when I left the ER "I'd like to take off your pants again and inspect your package. Just not during a medical emergency..." We're hooking up tonight.
Points for getting a hot hook up after getting a shard of glass in your thigh. Almost makes it worth it.
You were typing for me while I was hyperventilating into a paper bag on the floor.
So my flight takes off at 8am. Does this mean I need to break my airport bar pre-flight ritual?
Aren't you the one who taught me that airports are the judgement-free drinking zone?
i just smoked marajunia from a shotgun barrell. what have you done today?
As your friend, I promise I will drink a full bottle of vodka and belly slide down the stairs with you if that test is positive
Hypothetically speaking...if I was arrested in Wisconsin, say Kenosha county, would you post my bail all the way from Oregon? If yes, will you also accept my collect call in t-minus 13 hours?
Randomize
