I know they r crazy. However porn on a big screen is an easy commitment. They come with mute, stop, fast fwd and replay buttons. if only all women came that way...
Teenaged girls are God's best work and the Devil's best tool. Remember that my friend.
you were so drunk you slurred your pauses
i wanted to go smoke pot, so i told my mom i was getting tutored. she asked what time i would be back, i told her learning doesn't have a curfew
just got my tax refund and at bell. how do you say i want a grand worth of 5 layer burritos in spanish?
i'm drinking margaritas from a pouch...really dont think i'm in the position to judge anyone...
I should have to wear a sign around the rest of the day so everyone knows the shame I feel.
Talking to a male stripper. About the LSAT. Only in Vegas.
to instagram or to not instagram the picture i took of when i shit in the urinal
You kept going up to guys in plaid and screaming "are you a lumberjack" in their faces
This guy is walking around with a deer head on. Honestly what the fuck
Soooo we should kick it sometime when it's like light outside. Drink outta cups.. Be bitches. 7, 6, 3, 5.. 4, 2, 1... Sschhkiddaellladiieessscchk
I'm pretty sure the Jahovah's witness only came to our door because the front says "Twerk Or Treat"
I feel like my sexual preferences are just another sign that I am a 75 year old drag queen in a 29 year old woman's body.
He woke me up holding a gallon of apple juice and a shot glass...
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