Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
Are you seriously picking mariokart over a blowjob? nott to sound like a bitch but seriously?
hey sry I lost all my numbers who is this?
pat the guy you slept with
still need a last name
I just had a Brazilian done for this guy. He's getting first-date sex whether he wants it or not.
Just did my hair and make up at mcdonalds so we're in the same boat.
there's nothing weirder than waking up to your mom eating breakfast on the couch that you fucked her coworker on last night.
when he pulled his cock out I told him he'd brought a knife to a sword fight
Names, who you're caught in bed with, both minor details
Please come and kill me with a brick you dont even have to be nice about it just smash myfucking skull in this is the worst hangover ive had for at least a week
A place where it's acceptable to show body parts is not a good place for me to be.
Not as much as my roommate, who is in the middle of one of the pictures throwing a lawn chair at a cop car lol.
Did I just hear you ask Siri about the meaning of life?
The only reason I have clothes in my overnight bag is to cover up my sex toys.
He snorted adderall on my table. I have a feeling he's not trying to buy me flowers
😂😂😂 what are we doing to these poor guys?!
Maintaining the status quo.
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