Every time there's an awkward silence a gay baby is born
Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
I jusy said out loud "gingers unite in the middle of the night"
I have so many mobile devices now, I only use my laptop for porn.
Watching intervention at a bar. Who let this happen??
It's official. 2011 is the year of sport fucking
She wouldnt stop trying to stick her finger in my ass. I wish she wasnt so hot
I was using my Beauty and the Beast blanket as a makeshift skirt because no pants
Playing Cards Against Humanity with my relatives at Christmas while I'm stoned was a bad idea...
I have need of you to return home with haste, as I require the magical capsules you possess to relieve the posterior pain I am living. I battle this demon with stubborn grit, however I feel that defeat is on the horizon.
I'll meet you in hell with unlimited boxes of wine though
Your youporn search history says otherwise.
I knew how high you were when you put a french fry in your mouth and said 'fuck, this tastes like meat but feels blue.'
so you can go out and drink with me then fuck me, or you can come over when i get home and fuck me, or you can come over before and fuck me, or you can come over before and after and fuck me... so many fucking options
He woke up and decided to go for a swim in the lake... At about 3am... With his dogs
Randomize
