was it morally wrong to have used his girlfriends makeup after i fucked him?
I feel awful
Physically or morally
Physically. The only immoral thing I did was steal money from strippers while they gave me lapdances.
What are you doing St Patricks day? I'm banned from all work parties with open bar ever since the cinco de mayo party that I dumped a drink on my co-workers head and played air guitar on my boss' ankle cast.
I thought I was pretty much sober now but then I realized I've been eating scrambled eggs with my hands...
So, the officer that worked my wreck, I'm rockin his world tonight. He saw me high on morphine in the ER. So he knows my level of crazy. Think he'll agree to wear his gun?
So many things can go wrong tonight.
its like my brain is a tree and you are those little cookie elves
My flask has coffee in it for finals week.. So that's responsible right?
sidebar: i fucked your brother last night
we fucked in the backseat of my car at the observatory, right under the stars. it was a starry, orgasmic filled night
He's bringing a lesbian pretending to be his girlfriend to family Christmas. I can not wait to see how this goes.
Hell no. Last time I used a Slip N Slide I ended up with bruised ribs, a broken fence and the hatred of a half naked girl with a sprained wrist.
Yeah last night got weird fast. No lie, a kid pulled a butt-plug with a tail out of his ass.
You shouted "my financial aid just came in, who wants a shot?!" Half the bar followed
i dont believe you. i want proof. if you end up at a hospital send me a pic.
I’m the skeleton in his closet, but I only come out on Tuesday and Thursday afternoon and when his wife is out of town
Randomize
