that's just what I need...drunk ass people throwin hatchets in the dark.
sometimes i wonder what i would do without sheltered catholic girls w/ overprotective parents
never have sex?
At Grandmas for dinner. She is drinking a smirnoff ice. As soon as I saw it I had to stop myself from yelling chug.
Only you would get a date out of getting hit by a car
Why doesn't the washer have a puke setting?
This is like the time you took a picture of your knees and told him it was your tits, isn't it?
When I found her she was drinking wine out of a plastic bag in a bathroom stall, staring at herself in the mirror and crying hysterically. Cabo does things to a person...
It's only Tuesday and I just measured and checked to see if my 6'5 Friday booty call will fit in the back of my jeep comfortably.
My professor just told me I'm living a lie and I found puke on my pants. How do you think it's going?
Dude just bought the table 3 bottles of champaign and broke one on the floor as his "signature" and he makes me want this recession hit harder
I got dropped off at my house at like 1030. Woke up hugging a street cat I've never seen before. Ended up drinking 260 oz of beer. 65 types. Then went out after blehhhhhh
WHY IS THERE A GOLD FISH IN MY BONG??
Let me get this straight. You stopped mid foreplay to shave your legs?
Um yeah. I wasn't about to shave them if nothing was happening. And I have HBO. It's not like he's the victim here.
I currently don't understand fingers.
I got there and she was on her balcony drinking out of a bottle of vodka and smoking a cigar.
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