we have officially lost it.
I woke up this morning with "guy in polar bear j.crew boxers" written on my stomach along with a 5 digit phone number...
Just saw someone buying TWO six packs of O'Doul's. WHY ??
I have jerked off in every room in your house. *the more you know
It's raining. Will need ride home and blow job.
This reunion sucks. All the confident hot girls from high school are still confident and hot, and none of the fat girls with low self esteem transformed into hot girls with low self esteem.
I'm pretty sure I said "this might be the last time I'm in here" but then I took his pants off so that's a mixed message
I feel like if you're funneling natty lights on a Wednesday at 2:30pm at the apartment complex pool during finals week, you probably don't have your priorities straight.
Now the circle is complete. Just interviewed a guy who was a higher up member of the team I worked for in my job before this place
It's 10:15 on a Wednesday night and my dick is covered in pop rocks. How's your Wednesday going?
Is it bad that I'm tindering right now? I'm naked on his couch while he's slaving over legal documents for work. And he doesn't have cable, so what else am I supposed to do?
I would throw a dart into the Olympic ceremony and fuck whoever it hit
Woke up with a $100 bill from the Philippines in my bra & an unopened box of sour patch kids next to me. I have some questions.
oh he pulled my dick out. wanna come over after he leaves
GET OFF YOUR PHONE
I’ve slept with a Senior, a Freshman and a Junior so far. I’m a Sophomore away from hitting for the cycle
Randomize