Christians are straight up FREAKS
I'm gunna smoke cigs today. I feel like I'm in that powerful and gritty mood which requires them
I can't remember last night. I must have yelled at your girlfriend til she cried again.
Yup.
you tipped EVERY employee at white castle
I'm sure it was awkward. I've never had a professor expose parts of them to me before.
Was that not clear on Friday when I nearly deapthroated two ice cubes?
I'm sorry for peeing on your door. But it was your decision to open it.
Get caught with marijuana. Cop takes piece. Buy new bong. Circle of fun.
Status Uddate: I lost half a tooth and Alison is taking Amy Grant requests via bullhorn
I shame-fucked to Hotel California, don't tell me about priorities.
If you were awake I would probably ride my bike over, fuck you like a god, leave you in the wonders of life, and bike home
I was told my cock was a religious experience.
There is a severe lack of banging on that itinerary... I'd like a revision on my desk within the hour
Also- should we send out holiday cards? That say, "Eat a dick, 2014"?
No I kepy moaning and just called out a name to make them believe I was actually having sex instead of masturbating.
Randomize
