Doo rag and shades in the bar. You are missing your future husband.
i felt like cinderella. except at midnight i turned back into a whore.
i just fingered the ice cream at home instead of getting a spoon
been there done that
I've blown a few things in my day
I just snorted a line of adderall through a rolled up business card for the Michigan Law Admissions Office.... Tell me I'm not motivated
how do you tell someone you stalk them in a non-creepy way
you don't.
The new google images is a smorgasbord of porn now are plans for tonight are off.
You were passed out on the chair and when I asked you if you were okay you looked up and said "I'm fine, I was just pretending for a picture" then passed out again.
Sometimes I wonder how different my life would be if I didn't share a weekly margarita with my mom since i was 12
You know how hard it is to drive a dirtbike down a road with 2 plants of weed on your lap. Fucking hard
Half of my brain feels like I donated it to science and they basically just poured jack Daniels on it and put out cigarettes into it before returning it to my skull
I guess, all I remember was giving you road head the whole way there so you wouldn't fall asleep.
He was hammered and shot his pistol into the lawn. Next thing I know sheriffs are at our house with M4s. He likes to party
I should not be this drunk in a place where a girl is wearing a princess dress
I have seen you puke and 5 mins later rock my world. So there is hotness there that average people will never see..
Randomize
