please tell me I'm in your upstairs bedroom. Just google mapped myself and I have no idea where I am.
You tried to tip the paramedic for finding you.
If turning my entire backyard into a slip-n-slide is wrong then I don't wanna be right
We're trying to see who can drink the most and still be eligible to donate blood tomorrow.
you threw up into the pocket of your shirt. which was pretty damn polite
Not going to lie- I'm a little freaked out camping right now. This is one of those high activities you don't do by yourselves...or close to bears
FACE TIME HER WHILE YOU GUYS BANG
My last 2 google image searches were 'a lot of pudding' followed by 'a generous portion of pudding'
Didn't shower and drew a couple dicks on my face before I went to work. Boss sent me home. Sacrificed my dignity for a 3 day weekend with you guys.
just got a call from a life insurance sellsperson and apparently our xany dealer referenced us. not cool thats breaking the 4th wall
We had sex on his grandparents floor... the taxidermy deer was staring at me the whole time!
If I die at work, I want you to have my mustache collection
There are way too many people I have fucked in this class for this not to be awkward
annnnd thats why you don't tip your waiter by flashing them
last final went out with a bang.. 20 min late bra-less, cum in my hair and i still cant find my shoes.
Randomize
