Omg. It looks like a crack pipe exploded in your mouth.
you wouldnt answer to anything but devil's advocate all night.
Please return the baby Jesus and sheep to the quad
never thought i'd see a ''climb of shame'' until she came down from the attic in front of the whole party..
as they left, you opened the door, dropped your pants then yelled "don't leave, this is what you're missing"
if this hangover is indicative of how 2011 is gonna be, i want nothing to do with it
There needs to be waaaay more alcohol in my apartment if I am going to survive being unemployed
All I remember is lecturing my dog about how she's a lucky bitch to have a structured eating and shitting schedule.
Han Solo would be ashamed of me.
I mean, on what planet are nipples suppose to look like that?
I almost went home with him but then my hydroxycut fell out of my purse at the bar and I ran away
And he came by and picked me up. We cuddled in his car then had sex until... an officer doing his rounds put a spotlight on crazy haired, naked me straddling him.
Like he was inside me when I made eye contact with a police man.
Wore a burger king crown while giving head still drunk this morning #blessed
My phone just put together a highlight reel of yesterday's dick pic session, set to music and everything
Throwing up in a storm drain... Not my finest moment.
But my shoes looked boss
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