Ok im wearing a joe flacco jersey and full stick on unibrow and hardly anyone else dressed up omg
Omg suz!! take the unibrow off
No! im just getting hammered instead
I think I kinda wanna bone that ginger from Harry Potter.
You literally just made my flesh crawl.
I would rather wake up to a truck driver than wake up to her
I think I've given more of my business cards to Chipotle trying to win free burritos than anyone else
why did u have a candy cane hung on your dick in the first place?
she has a santa fetish
cute.
well at that point we were just fucking to keep warm.
My roommate says its rare that you can be tear gassed before you lose your virginity so i feel accomplished in life
Do you remember trying to use a pencil, pen, and sunglasses as your second form of ID at the bar when they wouldn't let you in last night?
Ok I have to ask, whose idea was it to used crushed up norcos as margarita salt? And what did they say to convince everybody else to think it was a good idea?
Will that be creepy to wake him up at midnight with my tongue all over his body??
Fulfilled a bucket list goal last night. Borrowed a dollar from a stripper to buy smokes
God bless Atlanta.
Yeah then you killed that bottle of Bacardi in under 20 minutes. So much for being an organ donor.
She called to say the cops were not fake cops. some one has to go get her in an hour
I just got winded making my bed. How do you think the workout plan is going?
You wrapped yourself in tin-foil and told us you were Iron Man. I have pictures.
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