just drove past a church sign that said "jesus got 'er done" ... welcome to the south
Then she called me a home wrecking whore.
dont they live in a condo? that doesnt count.
What do you mean you don't pregame your bikini waxes?
I've never seen so many strippers at a funeral...
There's a pair of socks on the bar. No-one's questioned this.
not much just sitting outside his bathroom door naked eating cheetoes. You?
My chest hair is, as we speak, arching upward to embrace my neck beard. The union will be a storied one.
If we order a pizza and I contribute 9 cents, is that fair?
I can't believe I ever hated her sister or friends. They got her some sexy sexy ass lingerie for the honeymoon. I think I love them bitches
I think we need to dedicate ourselves to building your stamina back to uterus breaking level
My boyfriend's brother just got out of jail and he is already telling us to steal cable. Dude.
I think if you have sex on the couch it will psychologically damage it.
Apparently she "missed me" and the only logical solution was to fuck my brother.
Drink water, eat food, and stop tazing yourself
He’s actually a personal trainer. He said he hasn’t taught yoga in a while but the stripper prefers to introduce him as a yoga teacher
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