shes the kind of girl i dont like to talk to unless my penis is in her mouth.
I want to do you till i cant cum anymore. Till all i get is a little flag that says "bang".
he recorded me cumming with the t-pain app on his iphone
you just started pointing at the light and whispering "star wars"
as we were driving back from the frat house he pulled down his pants and convinced me his penis "wanted some air"
It's 4th of July all over again, we were chasing with the pool water.
Tough to be a good wingman when you puke on yourself and everyone w/in a 5 ft radius at the FIRST bar we go to so don't tell me to step my game up
I let him watch sportscenter while we fucked. How did he repay me? I'm now missing class to get a shot in the ass for the clap. You and I are getting wasted and keying someone's car this weekend.
God and karma are having a fucking field day with my body today.
Ok. You have started something that can only end with a picture of the inside of my butthole. It may happen today or next year, but it's on my agenda.
But you put your finger in my ass and the rest is history
HAMMERED.. I made a peanut butter and jelly sandwich with toilet paper instead of bread...
I kept screaming at his rabbit: "IT'S OKAY, YOU CAN HAVE SOME TRIX. FUCK THOSE SELFISH BITCHES."
A good example of deductive reasoning: Knowing that when my girlfriend texts me "I promise not to smoke all your weed!" that she is...at that VERY moment...Smoking All Of My Weed.
At this point, I would not mind getting hit by a truck. It would mean I could get this over with quicker.
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