Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
i wish there was a holiday celebrated with pizza eating
Some dude just bet me $8 I couldn't smoke a pack of cigarettes in an hour...It sounds stupid, but I really wanna do it. If I survive, I'll have $8 and it'll look good on my resume.
just got high and bedazzled my bra. other than bleeding from the prongs life is so good.
I have eleven tally marks and an infinity sign drawn on my wrist in permanent marker. Senior bar crawl stole my liver.
oh my god i just remembered the cat blow jobs.
Don't play hard to get, I've seen some of the girls you've slept with.
There is nothing scarier than watching yourself breathe in the mirror while on shrooms.
BEER BONG IN THE STOCKROOM COME IN TO WORK TODAY
Nothing is more important than the last pool party of the season. Call in sick or gay or something.
he forgot we were at my place and not his so he tried kicking me out of my own apartment by saying "so, you can go whenever you want...."
tried to make it look like I had been conscious/awake and out all day when I stumbled into cvs at 6pm to buy plan B
update: I failed
Welp. June's off to a great start. I just ripped my pants, completely sober, at 10:30 p.m.
You can tell by the way he cuddles that he's got mommy issues
Left my house last night with a girlfriend, $200 in my wallet, and 10 finger nails. Came home with no girlfriend, an empty wallet, and 9 1/2 finger nails.
Yea, I had a bad night too aha
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