Maybe i should go to church more so i can meet girls like in that song, you know, the ones that act slutty on every day but sunday...
ah, so the catholic church. i gotcha
I just want you to know the floor between our rooms isnt sound proof "Captain Cock"
The reason i havent seen you yet better have huge tits
Going to get yelled at but I labeled the reel "four dried up sluts decide going to the middle east to shop during a war is the best idea ever"
it was like a zeppelin in a condom
He picked me up from the airport wearing nothing but a trench coat and a bow on his dick
Not sure if he was actually hot or hot in a "he brought a live chicken to the party" kinda way but I got his # regardless
He just fingered me to the Lion King soundtrack. And when he left he turned dramatically and said "I'll be back after work. Be prepared." Taint ALL the childhood memories.
And if I could both stabilize myself *and* pick things up with my penis... Well, I wouldn't be on the fire dept...
How did you get him out of the shower last time?
Order Taco Bell and leave a trail of burritos leading to his bed.
I convinced a German girl that I was born while my mom was water skiing and I preceded to barefoot ski behind her via the umbilical cord...
Lets just say the phase, What a dick, has a whole new meaning at the urinals.
Good morning! Spongebob is on channel 257 when you wake up. Help yourself to breakfast. You were great last night. See you when I get back.
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
I might be a bit late, couldn't find my pants and had to go to the police station. Unrelated
Randomize
