I feel like if your cat could talk she would call me a cunt.
Are you with Adam and his vodka?
Yeswdsssss I masde his pickle gi away ans he go anbnoued
Umm went to talk to a client ended up seeing his semi erect penis. This is my life.
the guy that filmed erin andrews naked got 27 months in jail. Every man that's seen it should send him cigs and a nail file baked in a cake. We owe it to him.
I'm kind of concerned that there are now two different videos of me with knives
he turned down sex AND sandwiches. who the hell does that?!
And you were like "stop making pop tarts, lil bowow" as you grabbed the pop tarts from your ex and consumed them. Teach me your ways.
Last I remember we played rock paper scissors for who would fuck the guy with cowboy boots on and I won..
is leaving the club to fk in his friends van subtle?
I totally just pulled my thong out of my purse at the grocery store. Oops.
It's amazing what a couple of orgasms can do for a girls demeanor.
I love you even if you are fucked up. If you fall, i'll just get on top of you.
Hey how're your balls?
Don't ever let me helicopter again.
He just looks like he'd be good in bed. He looks like he has a lot of anger built up in him and all I'm saying is that if he took out on my vagina I'm cool with that
I’ve basically been controlling him with my tits for months now, so I can’t even imagine what would happen if I start banging him
Randomize
