if you are receiving this text, you are one of the people i hate
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
So im on with some ukrainian stripper for a vodka tasting tomorrow. If I die tell my family im awesome
I don't know what you're talking about. I just drank beer out of my own bellybutton by doing a backbend and letting it run down my body.
You are literally throwing a tangerine right now. Beer pong is not played this way
I feel like all of the victims from Seven. Best birthday weekend ever.
I just got back to our room ....neither of us spent the night there but both our beds are occupied. send help.
One day her vagina is just going to shrivel up and seal itself with it's self preservation mechanism
Apparently after I threw up I put my socks in the toilet......
you texted him "it's time for the no pants dance", please get your tubes tied.
Well you were hungry, by then you cried and called yourself a basic bitch for eating crackers
Sometimes i think i need to stop drinking because i can't afford losing so many panties anymore
holy shit I just remembered that story I told about Tom hanks going bowling while high.
she made me cum so hard I dislocated my jaw. I'm keeping her
The only people who really get me are strippers and mascots for sports teams.
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