I wish there was an iPhone app to help you with your shitty personality.
She told me she got a 15 on her A.C.T.. that's when I knew it was a done deal.
He was telling me how the song fireflies makes him feel like he can talk to animals
Just shaved my vagina. It's been so long I forgot what it looked like. You need to come over right now.
His mom told be she once got turned down for playboy. 1 biggest mistake Hugh made. 2 is she hitting on me?
my goal is to masturbate without thinking about my exbf.
Last time I saw him the sun was coming up and he was asleep in the student wellness parking lot. For some reason people were peeing on him.
Their car went through the first bag of wine on the drive up...clearly 6 bags was not enough.
I am both excited and frightened by the fact that this much everclear is legal here. Best vacation ever.
Just think Febushuary. A whole month of 70's esque bush! This is the dream
if elf comes on TV one more time i swear to god i will smash my brains out with this fruitcake
I told her I was going to sleep early last night. I probably should not have sent that snapchat of us playing beer pong.
Can't trust a bar that doesn't have fireball
Listen, you eat the donut. I eat you out. Everybody wins.
You just kept telling everyone to call you MFT.. Mother Fucking Tornado.
Randomize
