you asked the guy at 7-11 if he remembered when you came in and threw news paper every where... then you did it again
My poor mother should have just stuffed me back up her vagina when she had the chance.
Everytime I think about NYE, my gag reflex kicks in.
You probably havent been upstairs if you think that the microwave missing its door is bad
I vote intervention dinner around 6, make up movie around 7:30ish, then apology drinks all night. Then hangover waffle house in the morning.
I know. They started calling me The Incident. The hotel maids, that is.
YOU DID DRUGS AFTER A THREESOME WHO ARE YOU TO JUDGE ME?!!?
I just woke up tangled in fishing line while wearing someone else's bathing suit with fishes drawn all over me. What kind of sex did we have?
Also just throwing this out there I don't think anyone who brings another girl back to your bed to share with you can qualify as a frigid bitch
One small step for man, one big gay fierce leap for gays!
Of course it may just be the context. A dish of dog food would look lovely next to your breasts.
As the cops are taking us away I see the strippers taking our DD backstage.
he's been dating her for 18 months and cheating on her with me for 16. if that's not commitment, i don't know what is.
it was an ACCIDENT
it was a DICK
all i'm saying is don't blame me if your purses are filled with whoppers
are we talking malt balls or BK?
Randomize
