what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
he had more hair on his balls then in my Easter basket
I cannot remember December 31 for the past 3 years. it might as well not even exist on my calendar anymore
The two guys from next door helped him do a backflip. The ended up throwing him halfway through a ceiling tile. Don't worry, we fixed it with duct tape.
Listen, don't freak out when you walk out on me masturbating in front of my roommate. No homo. He just needs to be put to his place.
I'm a gay man planning my brothers bachelor party, and he choose someone else to be his best man. I hope they like appltinis and gay clubs. Bastard.
FYI, Sammie and I made the executive decision that we're getting a pet octopus and keeping it in the ballpit. Just thought you should know.
if you didn' use the plastic sword on the cop. maybe this wouldn't have happened.
Last night did I take a piece of pizza out of your hand and then proceed to eat it?
Twice...
Seriously. Texted me 4 times and that didn't wake me up so he nicely called and left a voicemail saying he WOULD call me 8 times. So when he called back I answered.
Nothing will stop me from making the title of my paper "The Great Political Cock Block." Absolutely nothing.
I'd climb him like a horny MILF spider monkey.
Hahahaha. He sent me a dick snap in the lululemon stockroom. What is life. If this works out, this could benefit everyone....
I realized today that the only things I'm guaranteed to have with me at all times are lipgloss, condoms and a USB drive. hmmm...
I know you told me I shouldn't go see him...that's why I'm texting you letting you know I made it home safe from his house this morning
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