So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
I'm calling you out on twitter if you don't come over right now.
yeah so our basement was flooded 4 feet. we just smoke and drank and then went swimming. gotta make the best out of it
Her boobs are too amazing to be looking at my dick. I'm even ashamed.
I made my rape whistle into a roach clip device. FRESHMAN YEAR!
I hope he didn't notice that my shirt was inside out when I told him I didn't have sex with the guy. Kind of a dead giveaway.
Who wrote Most Moistest Dad on my chest and what the fuck does it mean?!?
He's used the term "balls deep" 3 times in the first hour. Thanks a lot, Plenty of Fish.
Hey, who is this? Sorry, you're in my phone as "you better remember".
Im organizing a group to help fondle my shoe. Too many shots dude. Too many.
Tom is laying in a bathtub filled with ice pretending to be a polar bear.
It was big, black, and had a smiley face tattooed on it. It was the perfect penis.
i came home after a long day at work and she dropped a plate of cheesecake and a bottle of whiskey in front of me and said here's dinner
I wish people could trade lives with me for a day so they could see how much better my life is compared to theirs
Woke up at 8am and asked if she had coffee.... She handed me a shot of tequila...
Randomize
