Tell her she can't have a vagina
i think it would be like really awesome if scientist could genetically engineer manatees to be like the size of goldfish so i could have one in my fishbowl and be like FUCK YEAH TINY MANATEE
Have thirty minutes until my shift starts. My heart says liquor store but my future says no
there's a picture of him beating off in the library with a cowboy hat. please steer clear of this one if you ever want to be respected.
had to split buying plan b over two cards. I will no longer challenge people to get on my level
I wore a leash I'll tell you about it later I had a fantastic time
the parents are super pissed...made eye contact with the mom while going down on another girl
Can you explain to me the broken disco ball in my front yard?
My roommate said I banged on the wall and said, "this dude eats pussy like a champ."
The last thing I remember was you puking all over the inside of my door and him yelling "PUKING RALLY!!!"
I just told the toilet I loved it. Bad sign.
I'm graduating college in 4 days. I already miss the bad decisions
Who knew a blowjob could cause this kind of crazy
He wasn't prepared for it
How many hotdogs are you going to eat today?
THE LIMIT DOES NOT EXIST.
If you fuck her..... You will be in great danger. Like in so much danger it would be like walking into a pit of crocodiles who haven't eaten and you also just stole their baby.
Randomize
