Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
That fat broad you banged out last night is still here and I can hear her snoring through the living room wall. I would leave, but I don't want to come home to an empty fridge.
can you explain to me why you commented on every one of my profile pics with "tits and beer ftw" please and thank you.
quadriplegic porn is always funny
no. no its not
can't remember last night but the beers were $3.50, so i can count how many I had by counting my quarters
i can afford to take several trips up and down the parkway right now if I wasn't still hanging over my toilet
We had sex and then he fed me pie. This is the best friends-with-benefits situation ever.
um, yes. it's my birthday, of course there will be acid.
in other news i'm homewrecking via instagram
I'm having a really difficult time dealing with the fact that my dog now shares a name with Snooki's crotch-spawn.
I feel like Captain Morgan shit all over my hopes and dreams last night...
Apparently, acid is a good substitute for cash if you don't have any! Who knew?
Do you guys think there will be a coke-for-Molly barder at bonnaroo?
Have you seen him ? Seriously. No one is that straight.
My mom added me on Snapchat which means I am officially done with Snapchat.
should i be that dick who brings a carpet in an uberpool
Why are you moving a carpet?
it's unimportant
Randomize
