I want to kish your cheek
My cheeks are in Michigan
Oh my lips are kind of stretchy
Do you remember getting into a Delorean last night?
i always forget that thursday isnt the weekend in the real world
We lost our room key and found it in his pocket with 3 pieces of fish.
A very confused plastic surgeon just called. Apparently I called asking how much it costs to get a vodka funnel installed straight to my brain...
Look on the bright side: Now that I'm sleeping with both the exs it's good bye to drunk sexting the 'wrong one'.
Remember that time I hopped home naked from the bar, then tried to convince you I was ok to drive you home? Good call on the taxi.
If we all have the time, and the weather permits, and you have no plans, we should have another go at Operation Get Our Carless Friends Laid. All the lonely people will be out. We can take our lonely people out too.
I get a little bitchy. We all know that
If Plan B had a rewards card I would have earned so many free tote bags by now
I'm not getting off this floor. I love this floor
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
I woke up on the floor with 2 cartons of cigarettes, a box of chocolate bars, and a business card for a man named Larry. Don't remember him, but if the Rols on his card is his, I might throw him a mouth party...
I think I just got booty called by someone I've never slept with or even really had a conversation with before.
He was a half hour late. His excuse was that his brother knifed him right before he was going to leave. I didn't believe him until I saw the gauze.
Randomize
