Also my back is semi rug burned and I'm holding you fully responsible.
I would love to give you more rug burn
omg my older sister has been googling "how do I know if I've had an orgasm?" and "bj tips". the family laptop is not meant for this...
wait can you just look around please? that was my favorite bra and i've already asked like 3 other guys
I'm drunk in class and I'm pretty sure the bible freak behind me is saying a prayer for me
i pounded out a 17-yr-old on saturday night
no, that is not a typo
i turned her down on fri night, googled the state consent laws & then caved on saturday
Just had to explain to a senior manager why I had duct tape residue on my wrist and hand. This weekend was a success.
I'm drinking bacardi out of her mom's eco-green starbucks mug and chasing it with her sister's "for track only" vitamin water. Hello suburbia
you will always have a special place in my vag
No, i know about the eggs and penis, the oh wow was for the fire
I woke up five hours later with a mouthful of Jimmy John's while clinging to my sandwich.
idk, it started getting weird when they were looking up videos of lesbian giraffes
This girl ordered Hershey syrup and red wine and he made it for her
On the way home there was a guy passed out IN the road on Colfax with his pants around his ankles, completely bare assed. If he was dressed as a speed bump, he succeeded.
Last night was incredible. I can tell by the nacho cheese on my jacket
i just turned on my printer and found 10 pounds of german chocolate inside. i think i found where you hid your candy last night
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