After last night, I could never be a politician.
There is a guy standing at my bar right now wearing an affliction SUIT. I can't wait on him.
turns out making maccaroni and cheese with whipped cream instead of butter is only good when your high
He's been grabbing my ass as a greeting since 2004, sex was overdue
i dont know what to do
with your life?
no, with my silly bandz, im already wearing 3
i'm traumatized. his orgasm face consisted of him looking like my dead grandfather and burping.
Pretty sure I scared him off for good. The lesbian in me is ecstatic.
FridayRule: If it takes you longer than 5 minutes to find a parking spot, you don't have class today
That's what you get for dating construction workers you meet in tunnels.
I'm not getting off this floor. I love this floor
I was grinding on my boss last night. So Monday will be fun. That's what's going on in my life right now.
Oh and he asked if I would occasionally still blow him if we had children. It was so romantic.
Just realized tomorrow is the anniversary of the time Dean and I glued DJ's leg back together with Neosporin and an Ace bandage. I'm bringing red velvet cupcakes to the party to celebrate.
There’s nothing that says motivation more than watching these little geniuses on Kids Baking Championship New Year’s Day. I’m ready to fuck shit up this year.
Thinking and hoping ice cream is the answer to my problems
Randomize
