happy early fathers day!!!
im not a father
about that...
On a side note I can sing drakes “best I ever had” so good you’d think I was on degrassi.
You have to stop making references to your extense knowledge of 13 year old girl television programming for me to believe you aren’t homo. The Bravo line-up was one thing, but seriously
I realize now. I should have just made out with everyone and anyone when I had the chance.
Just saw 30+ dicks. Explain later.
naw. unless you want me to sit in a corner, not understand english and eat all of your cheese then i don't think it's a good idea.
Thanks again for allowing my sister to lose her virginity on your bed.
Hey if there is a better reason to go drink then "I've been fucking robbed!" I have yet to hear one. Also, I've been fucking robbed.
Also, if you all get arrested i'm coming to laugh at you because i don't have the money for bail.
Went to the doctor's today. The lady took one look at my throat and said "oh god"
Too much penis in there.
Made a holiday JibJab of all my fucks. How's your night?
It was his birthday and he drunkenly offered me Portillo's and diamonds in exchange for a snap chat of my boobs. Even sober it seemed like a good idea at 3 in the morning.
I vaguely remember a drunken mid sex pinky promise to not let it get weird.
I'm going to become fluent in fucking Belgian boys
You sealing the pinky promise with a shot was much better than just kissing it
Tbh I’m not a vibrator enthusiast
But I am godly
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