Nothing gets me like the O.C. theme song does.
she just made some guy spank her... then made some chick take a running start and spank her.
These old men are woofing at me..PLEASE HURRY
He tried to stick it in and I asked him what he wanted to name our child and he quit.
He was like Sweeney Todd... But, without the killing people part.
So... He's a barber?
No. He's got crazy hair, and a revenge fetish. But he's hot. Does that make up for it?
That is an awkward looking cockshot, not gonna lie
i want to have awesome sex and feel fuzzy.
I don't want a mention or even a whisper of a Shakespeare Festival by that or any other name including, but not limited to, a fucking Renaissance Fair. Are we clear? It will be a DEALBREAKER .
He spelled Steven with "ph", needless to say my nose was almost bleeding from the amount of axe he was wearing.
I woke up on the green space outside our dorm cradling a watermelon and sucking my thumb. College is crazy man.
That's just how I roll. I drink, then tell people I'm either not wearing underwear or I'm training to be a stripper.
This toilet bowl is my home.
My books smell like weed. What does that tell you about my college experience?
Thumbs up
Look idk the rules and regulations of our freindship...but I need you to carry me to my car.
There’s a stripper dressed like a slutty pilgrim. Is that a thing?
Randomize
